I’m so thrilled to have today’s guest here at Tag(g)lines–author Peter Leavell!
I met Peter just briefly at the recent ACFW Conference after he gave a fabulous devotional on Saturday morning. I laughed. I cried. And that’s the truth. I’m itching to read his debut novel, Gideon’s Call, which releases next week.
Now, because I love getting to help promote new authors AND to make up for my upcoming absence this Friday (I’m out of town, thus no Friday post this week), it’s only right that we do a giveaway. So everyone who comments below will be entered to win a copy of Peter’s book. I’ll determine the winner next week on Tuesday using a random number generator. And then I’ll get in touch with the winner to see if you prefer hard copy or Kindle. 🙂 So be sure to leave a comment to enter! If you FB or Tweet about the contest, let me know and I’ll enter you twice!
How I learned Write Romance
Write what you know, they say. That’s why I don’t write romance. At least, I didn’t, until my editor recommended I fix my romantic scenes. He smiled doesn’t adequately describe a passionate relationship. Thus started my quest to learn how to properly write about the more amorous aspects of life.
Now, please understand—I’m married. But romance for my wife and me is spending an evening at our favorite bookstore, taking home our treasures, and reading late into the night. A reading date, we call it, but those outings don’t exactly generate passionate warm fuzzies to draw on for novel material.
To understand how little I know about romance, I’ll take you back to my teen years. While I don’t care to discuss my reading list back then, I must admit I used certain books to formulate my plan of attack for enticing the opposite sex. I often hounded the person of interest to utter despair in hopes her defenses would crumble. But, no matter the girl, real romance eluded me.
Why was it the young ladies I did not pursue seemed to be interested in me, while the others couldn’t have cared less? Years later, it finally dawned on me. In fiction, men have a single purpose: They must romance the girls. In real life, being chased by a heavy-breathing male doesn’t interest females. Apathy on the part of men seems to spur women into action. That revelation explained why, after I’d given up dating and any thoughts of marriage, I met my future wife, and we started dating—well, reading together.
After discovering that fictional romance was not the same as real-life romance, I read several books marketed solely to women. What I found was fascinating. Romance books were actually good. I was drawn to the characters and hung onto their every word. After all, their future happiness was at stake!
What did I like about the books? The journey. People getting from point A to point B together. And even better, I now had a personal journey with my wife to call my own. And I cherished our shared adventure. But to enjoy other journeys—how cool was that?
And then I grasped something very important. Every woman on the planet already knew about the journey. So I pretended I already knew about it, too, because that’s what guys do. But how was I to integrate this new understanding into my writing?
I figured there were two ways to tackle the challenge. First, I could pretend I knew what I was doing and wing it. Or I could search my heart for the true meaning of romance. I wish I could say I was visited by three ghosts, or that lightening struck while I was working on the Internet and all the knowledge of the WWW entered my consciousness (because the Web is a great source for romance, ha), but that didn’t happen.
Instead, tragedy struck. I stopped making testosterone. As a result, my muscles died, and I couldn’t get out of bed. I was helpless. Useless. I didn’t understand what God was doing.
Though I was no longer the man she married, my wife didn’t abandon me. She cared for me, staying by my bedside every moment she wasn’t caring for our children. In time, and with the help of God and medication, she nursed me back to health.
Then the answer came to me. Romance is two people relying on each other through the easy times and the hard times, two people who’ve learned how to uphold each other. Another word for such a relationship is trust. To me, romance is building and enjoying a shared trust, getting from Point A to Point B together.
Yes, candlelight dinners, holding hands, and kisses stolen under a full moon—I enjoy those moments. But to trust myself to another person, to talk intimately with that special person and know I won’t be humiliated, that’s the core of romance.
When I received those line edits on my manuscript, I knew I had some challenging work ahead of me. With a little help from my wife and a stack of romance books, I conquered. Today, in addition to my beautiful wife by my side, I have my romance-enhanced novel, Gideon’s Call, in hand. I’m blessed by two romances at the same time as well as good health, and I have to say, I feel wonderful.
Don’t forget to leave a comment to enter the drawing! I love Peter’s definition of romance. What’s yours?
Comments 53
Jesus. 🙂
I’m looking forward to reading this book. Congratulations, Peter.
Tagg, I’ll miss you Friday.
Jesus. That’s the best one-word definition ever, Jess. 🙂
p.s. I was at the store the other night and saw pecan praline creamer. Mmm…
I heard Peter speak at ACFW too and was quite moved by what he shared — his humility and his dependence on God as a writer.
My definition of romance?
Hhhhhmmm … No hard and fast one. But I do know romance is simpler than we make it at times. And, than again, it’s sometimes a complicated endeavor …
Romance = effort with a precious outcome.
I like the “effort” part. Because it’s not necessarily, always the flowery stuff we see in movies…although, I’m all for flowery, swoony romance onscreen and in real life. I just think it happens to go deeper than that, too. 🙂
And, I totally think you should be spontaneous and come to Storycrafters!
Loved your devotion at ACFW Peter, and very much looking forward to reading your book!
To me, romance is the proof of no-matter-what love. It’s the fizzle and the sizzle–the icing on the cake–of the real love underneath it all.
Fizzle and sizzle. Love that! 🙂
Well, Jess stole my first answer:) And Peter my second – that whole Reading Date, yep, Hubby and I do that. So how about…doing the dishes for me every night after dinner. THAT’s romance:)
Loved your devotional at ACFW, Peter. And Melissa, have a great weekend!
I loved the reading date thing, too!!! I’m not married and I’m not real big on keeping a lengthy list of qualifications for a future mate. I’d rather let God surprise me. BUT I don’t know, if I was going to write a list, I’d probably have to add someone willing to read with me to the list.
I love this!! It is amazing, that when you grow through life with your spouse, how your definition of romance changes! It is so not about flowers and gifts but so much more about acts of service at home and date nights at Target!
Just posted but it didn’t pull up my account….it was Amanda Fletcher in case you were trying to figure out which Amanda you knew had posted 🙂
Yay, Amanda Fletcher! I was just talking about you the other day…and how sometimes you would go over to HyVee and get ice cream for us. Haha!! And date nights at Target…that sounds seriously awesome. Especially if you’re at a Target that has a Starbucks…grab a coffee and then stroll through the store. Sounds good to me!
I love this!! It is amazing, that when you grow through life with your spouse, how your definition of romance changes! It is so not about flowers and gifts but so much more about acts of service at home and date nights at Target!
Peter, I love that you enjoyed the romance novels you read. I hear plenty of put-downs about the genre–but it’s usually from people who have never read it! And I read your article in the ACFW magazine–congratulations on surviving. I can’t imagine how difficult that must have been.
Melissa, have a safe trip!!
Jill, I thought the same thing. So many people poo-poo about romance, but it’s because they immediately think of sordid dime novels! 🙂 I used to be scared to say I write romance for that very reason.
Knew after you spoke at ACFW I had to have your book. Hope I win it, but if not, I’ll trot over to Amazon and get it. Love this post. And absolutely agree with Peter about trust being the glue that holds romance (and marriages) together! Tweeted this and shared on FB.
I had the same reaction, Pat…went out at pre-ordered his book on my Kindle after hearing him speak.
I like what he said about trust too. Don’t soooo many things in life come down to that?
And you’ve got an extra entry in the drawing. Thanks for FB and tweeting!
I was laughing so hard when I read this: “In real life, being chased by a heavy-breathing male doesn’t interest females. Apathy on the part of men seems to spur women into action.” This VERY subject has been a point of contention in my household for years! My husband is the owner of a landscaping company and he hires college guys in the summer and it’s been an amazing ministry for him – but, these young guys are often in the throes of dramatic romance troubles and my husband’s tagline over the years has become: “If you want to get a girl interested in you: ignore her completely.” I’m serious – this comes up numerous times a summer! When I try to defend the female sect my husband always turns to me, gives me that handsome grin of his, and reminds me it worked for him. I chased him for 9 months before he asked me out on our first date – because he ignored me completely! The sad thing is, there are three happily married young men in this world, right now, because they took my husband’s advice – they ignored the girl they wanted to get *shaking my head*. 🙂 Eventually, my husband tells the guys, you have to stop ignoring them, but wait until you’ve hooked them. (By the way, I read this post to him – at the risk of him having something to hold over me when this topic comes up again – and he said: “See, I told you.”) 🙂
Ahhh, that is hilarious. So, what you’re saying is, it’s a good sign that Tim Tebow hasn’t contacted me to date?? Hehehe…
J/K. Seriously. But that is truly hilarious about your husband…even if it is the kind of advice that makes you and I as women cringe, sounds like it actually works. Ha! And good job sharing it with him even knowing he’d hold it over your head. 🙂
And…see you soon!!
Great story, Gabrielle!
Loved your devotional at ACFW and love this post, Peter. Nice work. 🙂 (And yes, my husband and I have reading dates! One of the first things we did as a couple was choose books the other hadn’t read, read them, then get together to discuss them. Nerds? Yes. But nerds together at least!)
My definition of romance: someone who loves me for who I am, no matter what. Even when I’m a pill and a half. Even when my hair looks horrible. Even when I’m up and down emotionally.
Full commitment. That’s romance right there.
Yes! I love that you and Mike have reading dates! Did you have to read anything you didn’t really want to…but did anyway because you’d agreed?
Great definition of romance, too. 🙂
And, like I said to Gabe…see you soon!!
Great post, Peter! It’s great to get a guy’s perspective on romance. 🙂 And I think you hit the definition of romance right on the head – it is so much about the trust and moving toward Point B together.
Trust, yes! 🙂
Oh my word, I love this definition, Peter! This is why I love writing about romance AFTER marriage–it’s the best kind, the deepest kind that lasts. One person who knows you more than anyone else on earth (and still loves you!)–how perfectly beautiful is that?
My hubby was always probably more romantic than I am, but now that we’ve been married 15 years, romance has only gotten deeper. Basically, we can never get enough of each other–hanging out, laughing, whatever. We’re happily locked in for life.
I’d LOVE to win your book! My email is heatherdaygilbert@gmail.com.
Fun post, Melissa and Peter!
I love that your husband was more romantic than you. Don’t see that every day. 🙂 But I’m guessing it’s fun being on the receiving end. 🙂
Wow, this is excellent. Now I truly want to read (win) the book. I missed his great devotion because I was on duty in the ACFW Registration desk, & now I find I picked a poor time to be gone. I love the real and vulnerable insights here. I hope he writes lots of books filled w/ such truth.
Oh, Dee, I’m sad you missed his devotional. It was so good…and funny…and he even mentioned Tim Tebow. 🙂 But kudos for volunteering at ACFW! 🙂
Thanks, everyone, for your comments! I love hearing about your romances. Everyone has a different journey. Love it!
And thank YOU for being here today, Peter. I’m totally not joking–it’s one of my favorite guest posts. Thanks so much!
Romance is the flutter you feel when looking at your spouse after 36 years of marriage and know that all you have to do is say, “Honey’, and he comes to your side.
Aww, that’s sweet! And 36 years of marriage…awesome.
I have read Gideon’s call and enjoyed it very much. You did an excellent job. Mom and I took it to Oregon with us and we found ourselves both reading it at the same time. I would love to win a book for Mary, who has cancer! (Autographed of course!)
Thank you so much for stopping by, Martha! You’re entered into the giveaway. 🙂
This comment has been removed by the author.
Love this explanation of romance. Loved your ACFW devotional. Sounds like I’ll love Gideon’s Call too. Excellent post!
Thanks so much for stopping by! 🙂
Romance-Choosing and being chosen for always. Loving and being loved for always. Yes, that fits for both Jesus and Kenny! (actually, Romance-Being chosen and choosing for always. Being loved and loving for always, makes more sense… but the first one sounds/flows better…hmm)
Is using too many ………. the same as using too many!!!!!!!!? If so, sorry Melissa.
And Mr. Leavell, thank you for the blog and devotions that blessed those attending ACFW. Any time someone touches one of my kid’s hearts like that, it touches mine too. (Melissa’s mom)
Haha, Mom, I use … constantly. Like it’s my own personal punctuation system or something. So, you can be as liberal as you want with the ellipses around here!!
I love your definition too. I like the “for always” part the best. Because it’s sorta easy to choose and love someone when you feel like it. And it’s easy to believe you ARE chosen and loved on days when things are going well or you feel favored. But choosing and loving when it’s not easy, and being chosen and being loved when you feel undeserving, that’s awesome…
I enjoyed both devotions by Melissa and Peter. I was glad to see the Idaho guy do us proud (Bronco Nation!)
I think it is romantic to do something unexpected for your loved one. I’m not the biggest Valentine’s Day fan because you’re supposed to do it. There’s a much bigger impact when she’s not expecting it. And if my wife does a little something special for me, it makes my day.
Like someone said above, if I can’t win one I’ll buy one. Looking forward to it.
You sound like a good husband, Jason. 🙂
I’ve got you entered into the drawing. Woohoo! Thanks for stopping by!
I loved Peter’s devotional at ACFW. His story was a great reminder of God’s faithfulness.
Congratulations on your first book, Peter. It sounds wonderful.
My definition of romance is loving through the every day stuff and knowing Light shines through the dark times.
Good definition, Lisa. Is part of your definition of romance also writing a book as your love letter to your husband and then winning big awards for said book because the story is totally awesome?? Haha! Still so thrilled with you about that Carol Award. 🙂
Ah, romance. After being widowed for seven years, I met David online. As a Christian, I was looking for a mate— not a date. Since subtly isn’t one of my strong traits, I let David know right away. The most romantic thing he did (two months into emailing, before we had spoken on the phone or met) was to agree to exchange personal essays on what we were looking for in a spouse. I can’t believe I asked him to do that. More so, I can’t believe he consented. This Sunday, we will celebrate our sixth anniversary. And his essay was just a taste.
Oh my, I just love that. He wrote an essay for you…that’s just so sweet! I bet you reread it now and then. 🙂
thanks for the chance to read this fabulous story…
karenk
kmkuka at yahoo dot com
You’re welcome, Karen. Gotcha entered into the drawing. 🙂
I just wanted to say that I enjoyed this posting. I already have Peter’s book, so if I win give it to someone else. Peter’s book is wonderful. One of the best historical books I have read. I highly recommend it!!
Yay, your comment makes me even more excited to read it!
Melissa,
Great post today!
Peter, thank you for sharing your heart on romance. I think it’s wonderful the journey you’ve been on to discover the definition of it. So often, we just “do” romance without ever really thinking through what it means to both people involved. We don’t listen for the “love language” of the other person, as Dr. Smalley would say. But it’s SO necessary for romance to be more than 2-dimensional or one-sided, isn’t it? To pursue, not to pursue, to bring flowers, to bring a kitten, to go out, to stay in… are we wooing ourselves or the other person?
Wow – I’m rambling. Like Heather remarked, my hubby of 24 years is far more romantic than I am because of this. As a writer, I’m often stuck in my head, while he’s out there laying down his coat so that I can mindlessly preamble across it and not get my feet dirty. It’s only been in the last several years that I’ve noticed, and I’m smitten all over again, but this post reminds me to reach out and romance HIM, too. So thank you, Peter.
And I never did answer your question, did I?
Would love a copy of your book anyway – a manly romance? Yes!
beckydwriter(at)gmail(dot)com
Blessings,
Becky
Haha, I think you did answer the question. 🙂
This book looks really good and I loved the post but I’ve been thinking what to comment for 2 days b/c other people have such good answers. I’m not married but I think one of the most romantic things about Manny (my boyfriend) is when he remembers the details- he remembers my work schedule for the week (no small task!), will remember when I randomly commented about liking a certain food, will bring up a dream I told him about, remember some small detail I shared from growing up… makes me feel cherished.
Peter, I really loved how you shared your struggle of your wife nursing you back to to health. Such a beautiful picture of true love. Seems like my hubby and I are going back and forth in that role right now. It’s in hard times like those I’m so glad God brought us together! 🙂