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| No, I won’t be watching the wedding at 4 a.m.! 🙂 |
So, I’m trying really hard not to be offended that Will and Kate didn’t invite me to their wedding. I mean, I can understand falling lower on the guest list than the Queen…the Duke and Duchess of Kent…the Crown Prince of Bahrain…even the King of Swaziland. But I thought I might at least beat out the Beckhams.
Here’s why: (This is a weighty and comprehensive list, folks!)
1) When I studied abroad in London, I interned at Church House Publishing – the publishing branch of the Church of England. One of my tasks was to write rejection letters for book proposals. Among the wackiest of the wacky was a proposal from a woman claiming she’d birthed the rightful heir to the British throne. So, it’s possible, through the blood, sweat and tears (i.e. chuckles) I put into that rejection letter, I saved Prince William from an eventual de-throning.
2) I’ve met Archbishop of Canterbury Rowan Williams! He’s the guy performing the ceremony. He was installed as the Archbishop in 2003, which is when I studied abroad, and I attended a reception in his honor in London. Here’s a recap of our interaction:
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| See what I mean about the pointy eyebrows? |
Archbishop shakes Melissa’s hand. Melissa tries really hard not to stare at his pointy eyebrows.
Archbishop: Nice to meet you. Where in America are you from?
Melissa: Nice to meet you, too. I’m from Iowa.
Blank look from Archbishop.
Melissa: You know, where all the corn grows.
Archbishop blinks. And greets the next person.
Right, so it wasn’t a heart-felt bonding moment. But still, I met him.
3) I would be a very well-behaved guest. I am not crazy. I don’t do things like this.
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| I could totally pull it off, right? |
4) I adore lilacs. And anything lilac-scented. Among the royal wedding flowers? Yep, lilacs. Thus…how is it possible I’m not going to be there?
5) I think hats are really cool. But I never have an occasion to wear one. This would’ve been so perfect…
6) I am an experienced British wedding attendee. (Okay, so I’ve been to one. Still…)
If none of those are reason enough, how about this: I hear Kate is going British-traditional with fruitcake at the wedding. I seriously do not like fruitcake. So there’d be all the more for the rest of the guests. If that’s not a good reason to invite me, I don’t know what is.
It’s a shame. A real shame. Sigh. But maybe with enough nostalgic viewing of my London photos and a cup of tea or two, I’ll get over it. Maybe.
~Melissa
Comments 4
I didn’t get an invite either. So sad.
Oh, M-Tagg. I just don’t understand it. I feel your pain. I do. Will lift a cup of tea with you in honor of Kate and William. Wish we could watch the wedding together. Maybe we could text our thoughts?
And if anyone should’ve been invited, it should’ve been you, Princess Ash! (By the way, why did we call you Princess Ash, anyway? I can’t remember…I must be getting old.)
Thank you for commiserating with me, Beth. It makes me feel better! Oh yes, we could text! Though, I just can’t drag myself up that early…I’ll have to watch a replay later…:)
I don’t know what brought it up, but I found a family tree (shortly before moving to London in 2002) showing that I’m related to old school European royalty eg. Charlemagne (direct descendant) and a descendant of the royal line in England before William the Conqueror got control in 1066 (like some nephew of the king who was killed).
Not that any of that is relavant, and I’m the only one in my family with a posh, English name. 😉